I have now had three treatments in a row with no breaks! Praise the Lord! My counts were all good again today. I am doing four injections a week to keep my white count up. The insurance approved us to give those at home. Last week the nurse taught me how to do it and I'm giving the injections to myself. I have to say I am so impressed with myself! :-) I only wish Mother were here. She wouldn't believe it until she saw it and she would be impressed as well!
The Dr. said I am starting a build-up of mild anemia which he expects might become "unmild"! :-) If that happens he will give me a transfusion of red blood cells - which he said "is not the end of the world". He said they often give an injection to boost red blood cells but in "projects where the goal is to cure", they give red blood cells. I guess I'm a project! :-) And I'm so grateful the goal is to cure. Steve asked him about that statement. He explained that some types of chemo (my type) might be compromised by the introduction of the injections to boost red blood cells. Once again I thank God for His mercy to me, that this tumor was found at such an early stage that a cure is expected.
I have ample opportunity to see people who are dealing with advanced cancer or who have complications from the chemo. As I was waiting to see the Dr. I sat in the waiting room with two different men who were practically groaning every time they moved. It was heart-wrenching. Then today a lady had a reaction to the drugs while we were getting chemo. All "hands were on deck" to give her what she needed to counteract the reaction. Very scary. I am so blessed and I remember that every day
I'll share a couple of things the Lord provided for me this morning as I was preparing to go for chemo. When I awakened I had an email from one of my childhood friends. She was sharing the devotional she had read this morning. (She obviously gets up earlier than I do!) She said she thought of me when she read it, then she remembered it was Tuesday, so decided to share it with me. The devotional said, if we did God-centered thinking..."we'd see our suffering differently. 'My pain proves God's absence' would be replaced with 'My pain expands God's purpose'". Then she referenced Ephesians 1:11&12 "...having been predestined according to His purpose who works all things after the counsel of His will, to the end that we who were the first to hope in Christ would be to the praise of His glory." What a wonderful way to approach this day - and every day - knowing God is sovereign and my purpose is to bring praise to Him! I pray that I will be more consistent in that daily approach!
About an hour before my chemo appointment, the phone rang. I saw from the I.D. that it was a business acquaintance who is also a friend, from St. Louis. When he calls he calls to talk to Steve so I let the phone ring, thinking Steve would answer. I didn't know he had gone outside so I grabbed the phone at the last minute. Our friend was shocked that I answered. He said of all the times he's called, this is the first time I've answered! It was providential. God wanted me to talk to him I'm sure! He said he was just calling to see how I was doing and to let me know that he prays for me every morning! Wow! That was a huge encouragement! He usually calls to let Steve know that he has a deal that Steve can't pass up! :-) Today his call was just on time - to remind me of the many prayers that are being lifted to the Throne of God on my behalf. Once again, I went to chemo encouraged and strengthened!
The email and the phone call didn't come yesterday. They came today - just when I needed them! God takes such good care of me and I am grateful!
If all continues to go well, next Tuesday (May 3) will begin Cycle Four. I'm so grateful that we've had no delays recently. The same God Who has helped me through these three cycles will help me through the last three!!! (My iPhone app countdown says "8 weeks, 6 days, 18 hours until the last treatment!) Your prayers and support are invaluable. Thanks again!
Tuesday, April 26, 2011
Tuesday, April 19, 2011
Home Run?
Today was a good day! It appears that when the Dr. decided to step up to the plate and "take a swing", he hit a home run. Praise the Lord! In fact, he hit it out of the park!! My white blood count was not just normal, it was "high"!! So I was able to have my one-drug chemo treatment today! Thanks again for your prayers. I'm thankful for the healing touch God has given to my body that is allowing my bone marrow to produce blood cells that I need! I am grateful for modern medicine and the shots I can get to "stimulate my bones". God has given scientists and doctors amazing abilities.
All my counts were good. My blood pressure which usually runs "soft" has recently been really soft! Today it was acceptable! And I gained a pound!
Who would have thought I would ever be glad I gained a pound?!! My appetite isn't the best, but thanks to my brother's recipe for protein smoothies and to McDonald's medicinal chocolate milk shakes I may have found a cure for unwanted weight loss!! Now don't get me wrong. I'd be happy to stay at the weight where I am, but I don't want to keep this rate of loss up for the next 10 weeks!! So I'm hoping I will be able to hold my own. If I only lived closer to Ted Drewes I wouldn't have this problem!! :-)
I read again this morning, the verse in Proverbs 16:9, "The heart of man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps." We have my treatment plan "planned out" for the next 9 weeks and 6 days :-). I would be grateful if we could "sail" through without anymore complications with my blood counts. BUT, whatever happens, it's comforting to me to know that "the Lord establishes my steps". I will rest in that knowledge while we make our plans.
I suppose I will never get accustomed to going in for chemo. Every week I dread going. I'm not afraid. I just don't look forward to the way it makes me feel. We know a lady whose husband is going through cancer treatment, I asked her the other day how he was doing. She said, "He says he does fine - until "they" get a hold of him!" That's kind of how I feel. I get to feeling so good, that I "balk" a little when it comes time to go back in for another "dose"!! But, I praise the Lord that I feel so well between treatments, that the side effects aren't severe and that they don't last long! God is taking good care of me and I am very thankful. And thank you again for bringing my name before our Father. He is listening. Thanks for your love and support!
All my counts were good. My blood pressure which usually runs "soft" has recently been really soft! Today it was acceptable! And I gained a pound!
Who would have thought I would ever be glad I gained a pound?!! My appetite isn't the best, but thanks to my brother's recipe for protein smoothies and to McDonald's medicinal chocolate milk shakes I may have found a cure for unwanted weight loss!! Now don't get me wrong. I'd be happy to stay at the weight where I am, but I don't want to keep this rate of loss up for the next 10 weeks!! So I'm hoping I will be able to hold my own. If I only lived closer to Ted Drewes I wouldn't have this problem!! :-)
I read again this morning, the verse in Proverbs 16:9, "The heart of man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps." We have my treatment plan "planned out" for the next 9 weeks and 6 days :-). I would be grateful if we could "sail" through without anymore complications with my blood counts. BUT, whatever happens, it's comforting to me to know that "the Lord establishes my steps". I will rest in that knowledge while we make our plans.
I suppose I will never get accustomed to going in for chemo. Every week I dread going. I'm not afraid. I just don't look forward to the way it makes me feel. We know a lady whose husband is going through cancer treatment, I asked her the other day how he was doing. She said, "He says he does fine - until "they" get a hold of him!" That's kind of how I feel. I get to feeling so good, that I "balk" a little when it comes time to go back in for another "dose"!! But, I praise the Lord that I feel so well between treatments, that the side effects aren't severe and that they don't last long! God is taking good care of me and I am very thankful. And thank you again for bringing my name before our Father. He is listening. Thanks for your love and support!
Wednesday, April 13, 2011
Cycle Three - Yippee!!
I finally got to begin Cycle 3 of chemo yesterday! That's the good news! The "other news" is that my white count had gone back down, so the Dr. cut my dosage again - this time to 66%. Also as part of my treatment I will have to get four injections each week to boost my white count. The Dr. seemed to be perplexed about what would be the best route to go with my treatment plan and this was the one he chose. He said sometimes people don't respond like the textbook says, so we have to just "step up to the plate and take a swing"! So, this is the swing. I'm praying that it's a home run, not a strike! :-)
I am SO thankful to have begun Cycle 3!! That means that at the end of this cycle I will be halfway finished!! I continue to feel amazingly well! I thank God every day. My prayer is that my platelets don't go back down, following this treatment - like they did last time. That could mean another delay with my treatment schedule. I assume the Dr. thinks that by lowering my dose, it will minimize the risk of the platelets going down. I guess we'll find out next Tuesday (April 19) when I go back for the next one-drug treatment which is part of Cycle 3. I would appreciate your helping me pray that my platelet count will stay high.
The Dr. is checking to see if insurance will allow me to give the injections to myself at home. It would be more convenient than going in four days a week to have someone else give it to me. However, there is a reason I didn't become a nurse! I'm going to try to learn this new skill, but Steve has said he will be my back-up. He has a strong background of experience in giving injections - to our dog, Sam! I told him at least I won't bite and I'll hold still! My experience with giving injections does not bode well for my proposed new task. I tried to give an injection to Sam one time. When I looked into those puppy dog eyes, I just knew I was going to hurt him. I ended up squirting the medicine all over his back! None went under his skin. Then he looked at me with his puppy dog eyes again as if to say, "What was that all about?" It was not a successful venture. So....I'm hoping that someone at the Dr. office can teach me how to do this. If I don't succeed, I know I can trust Steve. I've seen him give injections. :-)
I will confess that after not having chemo for 3 weeks, I did not look forward to getting "doused" again. But, as before, the Lord's presence was with me, giving me a calm spirit and peace. I thank Him that the symptoms I am living with are so minimal compared to what some people deal with. I am still able to carry on with daily activities - which include a nap or two! I have learned to be thankful for many of the little things that I have often taken for granted. I am learning to "Rejoice in the Lord always..." (Philippians 4:4). As always, thank you for your prayers. They are what give me the courage to face each day! "I do not cease to give thanks for you..." (Ephesians 1:16)!
I am SO thankful to have begun Cycle 3!! That means that at the end of this cycle I will be halfway finished!! I continue to feel amazingly well! I thank God every day. My prayer is that my platelets don't go back down, following this treatment - like they did last time. That could mean another delay with my treatment schedule. I assume the Dr. thinks that by lowering my dose, it will minimize the risk of the platelets going down. I guess we'll find out next Tuesday (April 19) when I go back for the next one-drug treatment which is part of Cycle 3. I would appreciate your helping me pray that my platelet count will stay high.
The Dr. is checking to see if insurance will allow me to give the injections to myself at home. It would be more convenient than going in four days a week to have someone else give it to me. However, there is a reason I didn't become a nurse! I'm going to try to learn this new skill, but Steve has said he will be my back-up. He has a strong background of experience in giving injections - to our dog, Sam! I told him at least I won't bite and I'll hold still! My experience with giving injections does not bode well for my proposed new task. I tried to give an injection to Sam one time. When I looked into those puppy dog eyes, I just knew I was going to hurt him. I ended up squirting the medicine all over his back! None went under his skin. Then he looked at me with his puppy dog eyes again as if to say, "What was that all about?" It was not a successful venture. So....I'm hoping that someone at the Dr. office can teach me how to do this. If I don't succeed, I know I can trust Steve. I've seen him give injections. :-)
I will confess that after not having chemo for 3 weeks, I did not look forward to getting "doused" again. But, as before, the Lord's presence was with me, giving me a calm spirit and peace. I thank Him that the symptoms I am living with are so minimal compared to what some people deal with. I am still able to carry on with daily activities - which include a nap or two! I have learned to be thankful for many of the little things that I have often taken for granted. I am learning to "Rejoice in the Lord always..." (Philippians 4:4). As always, thank you for your prayers. They are what give me the courage to face each day! "I do not cease to give thanks for you..." (Ephesians 1:16)!
Friday, April 8, 2011
Quick Update
I have all good news and wanted to share it with you before the weekend begins. I went in Thursday for blood work and all of my counts were normal! Praise God for that! So, no injections this weekend!
This afternoon I got the results from the bone marrow biopsy. It was normal! Praise God again!
I am so grateful! The bone marrow results did give the Dr. information about the "cellularity" of my bones which apparently is lower than expected for someone my age. This is way beyond my understanding level, but if I understood correctly, that may help explain why my blood count doesn't bounce back as fast after chemo. I asked the nurse if there is anything I can do for that and she said, "No, it's just the way you're made.". So, I guess once again, spinach or ice cream won't help! But, I'm still going to try ice cream - just in case!
As before, thanks for your prayers. It's been a long two days - waiting for this report! I don't know if this new information will alter the treatment schedule or not. It would seem my bones are not the most cooperative he's worked with! I'm certain that we are on the road to the beginning of Cycle 3 on Tuesday, April 12! We'll see where we go from there! I'm glad I am depending on The One who is in control and that "all things are working together for my good"! (Romans 8:28)
This afternoon I got the results from the bone marrow biopsy. It was normal! Praise God again!
I am so grateful! The bone marrow results did give the Dr. information about the "cellularity" of my bones which apparently is lower than expected for someone my age. This is way beyond my understanding level, but if I understood correctly, that may help explain why my blood count doesn't bounce back as fast after chemo. I asked the nurse if there is anything I can do for that and she said, "No, it's just the way you're made.". So, I guess once again, spinach or ice cream won't help! But, I'm still going to try ice cream - just in case!
As before, thanks for your prayers. It's been a long two days - waiting for this report! I don't know if this new information will alter the treatment schedule or not. It would seem my bones are not the most cooperative he's worked with! I'm certain that we are on the road to the beginning of Cycle 3 on Tuesday, April 12! We'll see where we go from there! I'm glad I am depending on The One who is in control and that "all things are working together for my good"! (Romans 8:28)
Wednesday, April 6, 2011
Short Update
Thanks for your prayers! The bone biopsy is over and I have "slept off my drunk" for a couple of hours. I have a sore hip, otherwise, I'm no "worse for the wear". The procedure was virtually painless. They did a great job! It's not something I would recommend doing for recreation, but they made it as pleasant as possible. My Dr. said he has probably done 5000 of these procedures and that was apparent.
Once again, when it came time for the procedure, I felt peaceful and calm. Maybe some day I will learn that God gives grace when I need it - and not before! I thought I needed grace yesterday for today's procedure! It doesn't work that way! Yesterday, the words of the song that stayed in my mind were:
Those words helped calm my uneasiness.
When they did my blood work this morning they found that my counts had already come up - on their own! Thanks again for the prayers! The Dr. said that after seeing today's numbers, he was comfortable that they would rebound. So, I was hopeful that the biopsy scenario would be changed. But, the Dr. said "since we're all here" he wanted to go ahead and collect more data that would help him as he makes decisions regarding my treatments in the weeks to come. I did remind him that the data he was collecting were in my bones!! He laughed! (It wasn't a joke! :-))
We should get results tomorrow or Friday. The nurse told me again that the way the Dr. is talking, she knows he expects them to be normal. I will be glad to know for sure!
It is really amazing how God gives me a song for each day when I'm going through a difficult time. When I woke up this morning, the words that were going through my mind are a song sung by Lynda Randle, "God on the Mountain":
When I wake up with the words to a song going through my mind, I always stop and "take note" because I consider it a gift from God, and I listen with interest to "hear" what He's telling me for the day. Today's song was, as always, perfectly appropriate for this day of my journey.
If all goes according to the plan :-), I will start Cycle 3 this coming Tuesday. Thank you again for your prayers and friendship!
Once again, when it came time for the procedure, I felt peaceful and calm. Maybe some day I will learn that God gives grace when I need it - and not before! I thought I needed grace yesterday for today's procedure! It doesn't work that way! Yesterday, the words of the song that stayed in my mind were:
In Christ alone, my heart is found, He is my light, my strength, my song.
This cornerstone, this solid ground, Firm through the fiercest drought and storm.
What heights of love, What depths of peace,
When fears are stilled, When strivings cease.
My comforter, my All in All, Here in the love of Christ I stand.
When fears are stilled, When strivings cease.
My comforter, my All in All, Here in the love of Christ I stand.
Those words helped calm my uneasiness.
When they did my blood work this morning they found that my counts had already come up - on their own! Thanks again for the prayers! The Dr. said that after seeing today's numbers, he was comfortable that they would rebound. So, I was hopeful that the biopsy scenario would be changed. But, the Dr. said "since we're all here" he wanted to go ahead and collect more data that would help him as he makes decisions regarding my treatments in the weeks to come. I did remind him that the data he was collecting were in my bones!! He laughed! (It wasn't a joke! :-))
We should get results tomorrow or Friday. The nurse told me again that the way the Dr. is talking, she knows he expects them to be normal. I will be glad to know for sure!
It is really amazing how God gives me a song for each day when I'm going through a difficult time. When I woke up this morning, the words that were going through my mind are a song sung by Lynda Randle, "God on the Mountain":
Life is easy, When you're up on the mountain.
You've got peace of mind, Like you've never known.
But things change when you're down in the valley.
Don't lose faith, For you're never alone.
For the God on the mountain, Is still God in the valley,
When things go wrong, He'll make them right.
And the God of the good times, Is still God in the bad times,
The God of the day, Is still God in the night.....
When I wake up with the words to a song going through my mind, I always stop and "take note" because I consider it a gift from God, and I listen with interest to "hear" what He's telling me for the day. Today's song was, as always, perfectly appropriate for this day of my journey.
If all goes according to the plan :-), I will start Cycle 3 this coming Tuesday. Thank you again for your prayers and friendship!
Tuesday, April 5, 2011
Speed Bump in the Journey - Number ????
I'm starting to lose track of these speed bumps. I went in for chemo today to find that my white count was up - thanks to 4 injections that I received daily, starting last Thursday. But....my platelets were down. So, once again I did not get to have my chemo treatment. Since this was to be the beginning of Cycle 3, my ending date has now been moved out a week later.
Today the Dr. said that this blood count is not typical. He said my bone marrow is being "very individual". So, in an effort to figure out what's going on, he's planning to do a bone marrow biopsy tomorrow. I will also have more blood work done on Thursday, and based on that information, he will determine if I need more injections to continue to boost my white count.
As always, I appreciate your prayers. I have to say I'm working hard at not being discouraged. But, then, I guess that's not my job anyway! :-) This afternoon I read from Joshua, "Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go." So, I really do need to just "chill". I also read today in Isaiah, "...in quietness and in trust shall be your strength." I'm not in charge of this whole ordeal even though I do have each treatment mapped out on my calendar. And I do have an app on my iPhone that is counting down the seconds until my last treatment! :-) So now I have to change all of that! I guess I was thinking I knew the schedule. Guess not!
I have a Board of Governors meeting at Truman State University this weekend and I was not looking forward to doing that meeting "all drugged up" after my treatment today. So, the Lord took care of that. Also, I came home from the Dr. and mowed the lawn. How cool is that? I had to thank the Lord that throughout all of these days of recovery from surgery and the chemotherapy treatments, I have had no pain. Misery, yes! But, no pain (once I got off the morphine in the hospital!). What a wonderful blessing! So as I was riding the mower in the wonderful spring weather, I was SO grateful that I am able to do that - in the midst of my treatments.
I'm not looking forward to the biopsy tomorrow and I would be thrilled if, when I get there, my platelet count would be back up. That's how I'm praying. I'm also praying that if they do the biopsy, the results will show that my bone marrow is normal. So, thanks for your prayers. (I'm actually pretty nervous about the whole ordeal tomorrow.) I wanted to share this news so my friends would know how to pray. I'll keep you posted as things develop. Right now I'm scheduled to begin Cycle 3, next Tuesday, April 12. So between now and then my blood work needs to "shape up" so I'm ready. So you can help me pray for that! Thanks again for your interest, prayers, and support!
Today the Dr. said that this blood count is not typical. He said my bone marrow is being "very individual". So, in an effort to figure out what's going on, he's planning to do a bone marrow biopsy tomorrow. I will also have more blood work done on Thursday, and based on that information, he will determine if I need more injections to continue to boost my white count.
As always, I appreciate your prayers. I have to say I'm working hard at not being discouraged. But, then, I guess that's not my job anyway! :-) This afternoon I read from Joshua, "Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go." So, I really do need to just "chill". I also read today in Isaiah, "...in quietness and in trust shall be your strength." I'm not in charge of this whole ordeal even though I do have each treatment mapped out on my calendar. And I do have an app on my iPhone that is counting down the seconds until my last treatment! :-) So now I have to change all of that! I guess I was thinking I knew the schedule. Guess not!
I have a Board of Governors meeting at Truman State University this weekend and I was not looking forward to doing that meeting "all drugged up" after my treatment today. So, the Lord took care of that. Also, I came home from the Dr. and mowed the lawn. How cool is that? I had to thank the Lord that throughout all of these days of recovery from surgery and the chemotherapy treatments, I have had no pain. Misery, yes! But, no pain (once I got off the morphine in the hospital!). What a wonderful blessing! So as I was riding the mower in the wonderful spring weather, I was SO grateful that I am able to do that - in the midst of my treatments.
I'm not looking forward to the biopsy tomorrow and I would be thrilled if, when I get there, my platelet count would be back up. That's how I'm praying. I'm also praying that if they do the biopsy, the results will show that my bone marrow is normal. So, thanks for your prayers. (I'm actually pretty nervous about the whole ordeal tomorrow.) I wanted to share this news so my friends would know how to pray. I'll keep you posted as things develop. Right now I'm scheduled to begin Cycle 3, next Tuesday, April 12. So between now and then my blood work needs to "shape up" so I'm ready. So you can help me pray for that! Thanks again for your interest, prayers, and support!
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